She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize