barbara walters just said penis...
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
