: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
