bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
