He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize