yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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