his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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