Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
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