We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
