If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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