And the cops told us we were all naked.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize