Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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