So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize