Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
