I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
