So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize
