were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
