toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I'm really into asian looking animals
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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