who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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