We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
