party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
