i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
