my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
