you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
