i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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