U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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