yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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