Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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