he wants to bone in the snuggie
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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