Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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