Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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