The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
worst night to have a conscience
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I am naked and annoyed.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
