he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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