And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
