if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
