Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
