Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
