ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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