Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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