You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
