I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
