one might say we're banned from that church
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
