My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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