i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
