i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
