You just made me feel so damn special
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize