oh god the rape fog is back!
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She's the barista slut.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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