Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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