I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
