Im at strip club and am horny
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
