I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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