oh god the rape fog is back!
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
